I Don't Really Know What To Name This, Oh well
by Mord-Sith Rahl
Summary: Star Wars Quickies. What If...Anakin Vader Skywalker hadn't died in Return of the Jedi. Rated M for language Authoress uses because she has a potty mouth.
1. Intentions

Here is the beginning of little tidbits about What If…Darth Vader hadn't died in RotJ. I'm open to suggestions, and if I use them you will get a credit line. They'll all humorous, but I might put some drama or ANGST! (I love that word…it's a fun word…heh heh…angst…I like making fun of people with angst…heh heh…angst…Er…anyways…)

I don't own anything. I wish I did. Damn, if I owned Star Wars I'd be RICH! And I also would have given Darth Vader more scenes and lines…heh. I'm a Vader Whore. And PROUD of it!

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**Intentions**

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Heavy labored breathing filled the silence as Han Solo awaited for his date to finish getting ready. Looking everywhere but the black suit in front of him the young pilot nervously began twiddling his thumbs. Clearing his throat a few times he looked down at his hands as if sincerely interested. Hey…was that a new mole??...Han swallowed as an exceptionally loud breath was exhaled. He chanced to look up to look at his date's father sitting in the chair before him.

"What are your intentions with my daughter?" Darth Vader, now commonly called Anakin, asked his voice booming.

Han's head shot up to look at the former Sith Lord with wide eyes. "Uh...I...Well...You see...Er..." he stuttered not sure what to say.

When Leia walked out of her room a few minutes later she paused for a moment before rolling her eyes. "Father, will you stop Force Choking my date; we're going to be late."

Vader cleared his throat at a loss for words as he slowly released Han from his hold. "Uh...sorry dear. Have fun." Behind his mask he grinned sheepishly.

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Well, there's the first installment. I already have a few other ideas, but it might be a while before I actually put them down on paper (or the computer), but if I get enough positive reviews it might make me update faster. Even negative reviews will make me post faster, so that I can ridicule you and laugh at you for your inability to view things without a stick up your ass. Yup. 

R


	2. Random!

I think I offended people. (Grins) Excellent. Sixty-Four hits and only one reviewed, and she doesn't count 'cuz I've been reviewing/talking to her and asked her to check it out. Sorry Kenya. You're just special that way.

If I didn't offend you…then why the hell didn't you review? I need ideas people! Am I suppose to keep my title that forever?...Actually, it IS starting to kinda grow on me…aw, how cute. (Continues to speak in baby talk to the title.) Yeah, anyways…here's the next installment.

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**Just Some Random Chapter Title**

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General Jalor stood with his best friend on the sidelines watching Princess Leia in a sort of procession, smiling fondly to her brother who was also on the sidelines. Along with the Jedi Master were their close friends, and the Princess's lover.

"How did a girl like that end up with a lousy space pirate?" he mumbled.

"I know what you mean," his friend Alric sighed. "I don't see what she sees in him."

"She should be with an outstanding gentleman. A General perhaps," he mused smirking slightly and rubbing the slight stubble on his chin. "He doesn't deserve her." He wet his suddenly dry lips as she bent over to ruffle a small child's head of curly blond hair. "White is definitely her color. That dress…" he moaned. "Those legs, that bottom…what I wouldn't give to spend a night alone with her." His eyes sort of glazed over as he thought about the different things they would do, when he sighed. "Alric, keep your drooling to yourself. You're practically breathing down my back," he grumbled not taking his eyes off of the princess.

When Alric's breathing persisted he spun around to snap at him.

"Alric, I said…"

Whatever he was going to said died in his throat as a shrill whimper as he came face-to-chest with a big bulky black armor. Slowly his eyes traveled up to rest on the dark mask frowning down at him, the sound of a respirator drowning out the cheers of the crowd. All of his attention was on the former Sith who stared down at him, even he who was Force-blind being able to feel the Force around them crackling. He didn't even pay care to notice Alric trembling a few feet away in fear of the dark monolith.

"Now what were you saying about my daughter?"

As Jalor felt his bladder release itself only two words came to mind.

Oh shit.

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Didn't turn out how I'd expected, but still got the gist of it. Whatever. 


End file.
